Effective Written Communication

2006-02-25T08:29:00.000-08:00

Overview: Effective Written Communication Course

This web log was produced for the ICTY Effective Written Communication training course at the UN ICTY in February 2006. See the archive (left) for posts. There is a summary of each workshop, from workshop six back to workshop one, and additional posts with tips, articles and links on writing. Each post opens in a new web page. You can search the site using the search box above.

If you have not taken the course, you might like to scroll down to the bottom of the page and work your way up!

This web log will eventually be deleted so please copy any material you need for future use.

2006-02-25T08:02:00.000-08:00

Workshop Six Review

Summary of Workshop Six: Tact and Tone

The final workshop looked at writing situations which require tact. We read, evaluated and rewrote some tactless writing, and considered how some 'naked' messages could be made more tactful. Pages 39-45 give an overview of the main points.

In writing, tact is always necessary in formal situations where you do not know the audience very well or you have to communicate unwelcome, controversial or provocative information. Tact is also essential when expressing a grievance, making a complaint or making an accusation. In all these situations you need to get the balance right between communicating necessary information and maintaining good relations.

I suggested in the workshop three key points to consider about writing in difficult situations:

1. Don't give free rein to emotions in workplace writing, unless you know the audience very well and there is no danger of the text being passed on to others. Watch out especially for anger, frustration, irritation and aggression. Although these emotions may seem to you sometimes justified, they need to be expressed in writing with care. Email can be a problem because it is so informal. Bear in mind that everything you write in a workplace context could be forwarded to someone else.

2. Don't use writing as a stage for conflict. Writing is a poor medium for confrontation. Alternatives like phone calls and face-to-face meetings are usually more effective in lessening the chances of misunderstanding. Sometimes writing is not a good idea. Email is very tempting as a form of daily expression because it is fast and interactive; but it can easily lead to 'message regret' in workplace situations.

3. Don't press 'send' when you are unsure of the context you are writing in. Instead, save a text in draft form, have a break, come back to it later. You will probably revise and edit what you have written, even though you may feel better for having written it. You may delete or modify the vocabulary. You may remove or tone down some of the emphatic words. You may revisit your brief to make sure that you understand the situation correctly. Getting feedback from a trusted colleague - one who can act as your 'reader' - can make a big difference to how tactful you are in writing. It is also helpful for supervisors to discuss with staff what is required in written communication.

Don't Write!

As email is used for so much communication in the workplace today it is easy to forget that other media - especially the telephone and speech - are sometimes more efficient. A single meeting can sometimes take the place of hundreds of unnecessary emails. Misunderstandings can be dealt with more speedily over the phone than via email and there tend to be fewer supplementary questions. Writing is a powerful medium - but it's not good for everything.

Also, email overload can be a serious source of workplace stress and fatigue. Written texts are part of the memory of an organisation. If there is text overload, the organisational memory also gets overloaded. And that is when important things get forgotten or confused.

For more on this and links to sites on email etiquette, see my earlier post on this web log on 'Email'.

Being Tactful

Some points on tact discussed in the workshop:
* when making any kind of accusation or criticism, avoid 'I......you' sentences.
* always try to put the context or history first before making any difficult request - people are usually more receptive if they understand why they have to do something
* wherever possible, relate the request or comment to organisational policies and goals, not to personal conflict
* avoid starting off with negative phrases ('I did not tell you to do that...')
* avoid starting off with subjective verbs like 'I believe', 'I feel', 'I think' and try to put the facts of the situation first
* if you need to give bad news, try to give a context for this and provide a background explanation. Also, some motivating or positive ending can be effective
* move from negative to positive if making a series of critical points
* recognise the positive contributions made by the other person, don't dwell on the negative
* avoid phrases like 'it would seem that' or 'it appears that' as a basis for judgement
* avoid exclusive phrases like 'as everyone is aware' or 'as you all no doubt know'
* avoid 'must' and 'should' when making requests in favour of 'would' and 'please'
* don't over-use intensifiers like 'absolutely' and 'totally' and avoid using bold or underlining as emphasis
* when making requests to a large group, use the collective term instead of 'you' ('You are reminded..' > 'Staff members are reminded..')

Aren't You Contradicting Yourself?

Yes, in a way. Earlier in the course I suggested that effective, reader-friendly writing is concise and gets to the point. I encouraged removing padding rather than increasing it. However, tactful situations require special handling. In certain situations sometimes you have to write more, not less, in order to be effective. The problems in writing come about when every situation is treated the same, and more is always assumed to be better. Tactful writing is about careful phrasing and editing, and not about the number or length of words used.

2006-02-25T07:34:00.000-08:00

Examples of Writing from the Course

Some examples of writing by students on this course in response to assignments 2 and 3 (the NGO letter and the grant proposal).

Example 1: NGO letter by Jozef Stahuliak

Dear Members of Fiscal Non Governmental Organization,

Following the recent telephone conversation between Mr. Peter Xavier, Director of Non Governmental Organization (NGO) called Global, and Mr. Johan Peterson, Head of NGO Fiscal, I would like to propose a meeting to improve cooperation between our NGOs in the country of Balalan.

Numerous cases of human rights abuses were reported by independent media in this country following a recent violent civil war which totally devastated the economy and governmental structure in the region.

As you may know our organization was very active in the region especially in the capital city Balan, where our main office was located. Unfortunately we were forced to vacant the country to avoid unnecessary casualties to our staff at the end of 1994. At this stage we are making serious plans to return back to this country and resume our activity, which is monitoring and protection of human rights.

Our future cooperation in the region could be beneficiary to both parties. The financial strains on the budgets of our organizations could be lowered; therefore more money would be available for various independents projects. Sharing the premises will also help both sides to save additional financial resources on security and safety arrangements, which will be quite high due to the fact that so many civilians are still armed and the situation in the entire country is quite unstable. Sharing various contacts with current governmental representatives could also save us a lot time, especially at the beginning of the mission.

We are planning to resume our work in the region at the beginnings of July 2006 therefore we would like to meet before the beginning of April 2006. The most convenient place for the meeting would be in The Hague in The Netherlands, where our branch office is located. Nevertheless, we are open to any suggestion from your side.

Would you be so kind and respond to us by the end of this month so we would have sufficient amount of time to organize and develop our future strategy for the region of Balanan.

Yours faithfully,

Mr. Peter Xavier
Director of Global Non Governmental Organization

Rob's comments: This is a well structured and motivating letter, taking account of the potential delicacy of a situation where one organisation is proposing cooperation with another. The letter sets out the position of the proposing NGO and then moves to the benefits of cooperation. The middle part of the letter is particularly effective in giving persuasive ideas but without dictating an agenda. The writer knows that this is just the first step. Similarly, at the end of the letter the tone is tactful but also confident about cooperation. One thing I would change: the salutation at the top should include the name of the addressee, Mr Peterson. Of course, the letter would be shared with the receiving NGOs Board; but it is conventional for the letter to have a named addressee at the top, even though the organisational 'we' is used in the body of the letter. Note: For reasons of space I have removed the addresses/date which would appear at the top of the letter.

Example 2: Grant Proposal by Dijana Vujec and Snjezana Krajisnik.

The Landmine Education Trust (LET) is seeking a sum of Euro 100,000 to support a landmine awareness and education programme which it has recently introduced in the country of Balanan.

The LET was set up in 1978 by a group of doctors who worked in the Angolan civil war in order to provide help and support to future landmine victims in conflicts around the world. We are currently active in landmine education and awareness programmes in four parts of the world. The LET has developed effective training materials designed for use in the field and with all age levels.

Landmines cause lasting damage in the years following a war. In 2004, 20,000 deaths and 50,000 serious injuries were caused by unexploded landmines around the world. In some cases these accidents took place as much as twenty years after the end of hostilities.

The current situation in the Kingdom of Balanan requires urgent action. It is estimated that nearly half a million unexploded landmines are still present on the island of Balanan, left over from the ten-year civil war. Something needs to be done to address this problem and it is clear that a mine education and awareness programme is urgently needed.

In order to help this troubled region, we plan to provide education and awareness programme for local people. An advance team from the LET has been at work in Balanan since January of this year establishing the first training centre. The programme will help people to: identify areas where mines are still active; organize local communities to seek alternative farming areas; and work with UNIBAL in its efforts to defuse mines. Above all, the LET wishes to train local community leaders in Balanan in mine awareness techniques. We hope that these techniques will then be disseminated through the communities.

The LET is seeking a sum of Euro 100,000 to support a landmine awareness and education training programme which it has recently introduced in the country of Balanan.

Rob's comments: This is very well-organised proposal making full use of the 300 word limit. The first two paragraphs concisely introduce the main topic, the background and the organisation. Everything is relevant here and lengthy digressions are avoided by summary phrases such as 'in four parts of the world'. The middle part of the proposal outlines the current situation and links the facts to the need for action. The request for funding at the end is effective because the previous paragraph has clearly stated where the money will go. The language is practical and forward-looking.

2006-02-15T08:52:00.000-08:00

Workshop Five Review

Summary of Workshop Five: Proposals

This workshop looked at writing proposals. Proposals are common in workplace writing and do not follow the same pattern as memos. They are more like mini reports. They are usually 1-5 pages in length and are designed to contribute to an ongoing discussion or to suggest change - however small - in an organisation. Grant proposals are requests for funding and usually have a word limit.

In any proposal there must be a balance between information and opinion. Recommendations need to arise out of factual analysis and evaluation. It is usually not enough to say 'We think X should happen because of Y and Z'.

Plan your Proposal

As with previous assignments on this course, I suggested in the workshop that you plan a proposal by breaking it into sections, even though your final text may not have formal sub-headings. This gives you a sense of the whole text.

For typical proposals, I recommend that you use a drafting structure of four parts plus a summary. This is of course only to get you started and needs to be adapted to the specific situation, and the word limit, once you get writing. As we saw in the workshop, there is usually more than one way to organise the middle section of a proposal. We had two clearly different approaches depending on how you interpret the words 'background situation'. However, the basic structure was the same.

1. Short summary (one/two sentences) of the whole proposal.

2. Introduction: a concise outline of the situation or the problem, giving its brief history, who is involved, and the organisational context.

3. Analysis of the current situation: a mini-report of what the situation is like now. This often includes summarised data and evidence. Use an appendix or a diagram if you have a lot of statistical information and only mention the headline facts in the text.

4. Evaluation of needs: a description of why change is necessary and/or the possible options. This should emerge from the analysis of the current situation. It may include a comparison of bids for a contract, for example, or a review of a situation which requires change.

5. Recommendations or action statements: an outline of the proposal's suggestions for change or requests for action, building on the short summary at the start(1).

Proposals are more like reports than memos and may include additional sections such as 'Discussion' or 'Findings'. However, by following a rough outline like this you should be able to plan your proposal. It helps to organise your initial thinking in this way and then develop it.

In the workshop we looked at the next stage in writing a proposal - giving each paragraph a clear function and linking the paragraphs together. This is where the rough outline becomes a real text and specific pieces of information (eg history, data, operational details) come into play. The rough outline is always adapted in practice.

Try to get a balance between the sections of the text depending on your word limit. Make sure, for example, that the introduction is not overloaded with history or background if you only have 300 or 400 words. If it is overloaded, the evaluation of needs and the action statements will be drowned out. The proposal must give an impression of looking forward, not back. Avoid digressions - bits of information which lead the reader away from the key points of the proposal.
If you have a large word limit, consider using an attachment or an appendix to give further in-depth information. Charts and diagrams can also be very effective in communicating information quickly, though usually only in combination with text.

Often a proposal (eg for funding) has a word limit so getting to the point is important. At the same time, the reader needs to be persuaded. The balance can be achieved through good planning and the selection of powerful keywords for the whole text.

The summary (1) should be used to capture the essence of the whole proposal. It can be put at the beginning and again at the end. Headings are useful in any text of more than 500 words. But even if you are not using headings, make sure that each paragraph has a specific function and a small number of keywords that you want the reader to remember.

Some advice when editing a proposal:
* Remove unnecessary information from the summary and first paragraph
* Give a concise but brief account of the history - don't get sidetracked into a long story
* Use an appendix or table if you want to give lots of statistical data
* Select the main facts and arguments which will stand out (three/four is memorable)
* Make sure each paragraph has a clear topic sentence (see handout on 'Paragraphs')
* Break down long sentences into two, or edit out parts to make the main clause clearer
* Use one key word instead of a list of three (eg 'training programmes' is better than 'education, training and career development programmes')
* Use active and dynamic verbs, especially in the final section: 'set up', 'establish', 'launch', 'investigate'.

Other Matters

This workshop also included an exercise on proof-reading, always important in the final stages of writing. See here for some proof-reading tips (such as 'read you text backwards'. Yes, it really helps!): http://www.ualr.edu/owl/proofreading.htm

I also gave handouts on letter-writing conventions in English. For more on letters, including some useful starting and ending phrases, try these sites:
http://www.speakspeak.com/html/d2h_resources_letter_writing_phrases.htm
http://esl.about.com/cs/onthejobenglish/a/a_basbletter.htm
http://www.askoxford.com/betterwriting/letterwriting/?view=uk.

Preview: the sixth and final workshop is about tact and tone. We will look at difficult communication in memos and emails. How can we use written language to give clear messages, but do so in a tactful and diplomatic way which is appropriate to an international organisation? There will also be time for questions about the whole course. Please be prepared to give a short evaluation of the course at the end of the session.

2006-02-15T08:21:00.000-08:00

Punctuation

These marks do a lot of work in writing and it is worth spending time on them. Remember that punctuation varies culturally - commas in one language are not necessarily used in the same way in another language.

When you read, keep an eye on these little marks. Observe how writers use commas, brackets (parentheses), and semi-colons. Keep good examples for your own use.

In the course book I have a page on commas and also on different techniques for combining information.

A great site on punctuation is http://www.grammarbook.com/. This is the web site for Jane Straus' The Blue Book of Grammar and Punctuation. The site has a lot of free material - see the 'Punctuation Rules' if you have a specific question or you need to see some examples. Also try the quiz.

Note: this is a US-oriented book so will not please all lovers of British English. For a more British notion of 'correct punctuation' see http://www.correctpunctuation.co.uk/.

To find out the names of punctuation marks in English see http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Punctuation.

To test your knowledge of apostrophes and other punctuation marks play this game http://eatsshootsandleaves.com/ESLquiz.html based on a best-selling book by Lynne Truss.

Note: 'period' is used in US English, 'full stop' in British English. 'Parenthesis' is widely used in US English, 'brackets' in British English.

2006-02-15T07:44:00.000-08:00

Resources for Improving your Grammar

This post is copied and revised from my ICTY English course weblog at http://ictyenglish.blogspot.com/. I post three grammar tips on this site every week. Search the archive using the search box and you should find posts on most problem areas in English grammar.

What is the best way to continue to learn grammar at an advanced level?

Five short answers:
1. Learn as much as you can from practice and experience as well as text books
2. Keep your own examples and observe patterns (and exceptions) in the language
3. Know your weaknesses. Focus on particular areas which give you difficulty (eg. articles, relative clauses, gerunds)
4. Learn as much as you can from any feedback you get on your written English
5. Remember that almost every grammatical 'rule' is likely to be breakable in some situations (so don't become slave to rules!).

Books

As English becomes more of a diverse and international language it is less and less possible to point to an authority and say 'that is the correct way!' (or 'that is a mistake!'). But there are generally agreed conventions for British and American English grammar which you need to know, especially when you write.

For reference, I would recommend Advanced Grammar in Use (Second edition 2005) by Martin Hewings (Cambridge University Press, http://www.cambridge.org/elt/catalogue/grammarvocab/grammarinuse/#en-gb, ISBN 0521532914 with answers). This book covers grammatical points in an imaginative way, giving examples and practice exercises on facing pages. Also has useful summaries at the back. If you buy this book for self-study, make sure you get the one with the answer key! The third edition of this book also has a CD Rom. There is an Intermediate level English Grammar in Use by the same author.

For more practice exercises, try Advanced Language Practice (Second edition 2004) by Michael Vince (Macmillan Heinemann, http://www.macmillaneducation.com/ , ISBN 0435241249 with answers).

Online Resources

My top recommendation is the BBC Learning English site athttp://www.bbc.co.uk/worldservice/learningenglish/index.shtml. Excellent resources for reading, grammar and vocabulary - updated every day. Always worth a visit.

For practice exercises and tests see http://www.world-english.org/.

I would also recommend the OWL (Online Writing Lab) at Purdue University for guidance on grammar and writing: http://owl.english.purdue.edu/handouts/grammar/index.html.

For some useful quizzes on English grammar, donated by teachers, see http://a4esl.org/ (uses mostly Java and Flash).

I would also strongly recommend the pages on tenses at Englishpage.com. All the tenses are explained clearly and there are online practice exercises for each one. See http://www.englishpage.com/verbpage/verbtenseintro.html.

For questions on usage you might try the vast Alt. English Usage at http://alt-usage-english.org/index.shtml. This is searchable and very good for settling disputes over usage, such as: 'Do we say different from, different to or different than?'

More grammar guides are at the US Webster University site http://webster.commnet.edu/grammar/index.htm.

A teacher, David Tillyer, has produced a useful summary of a tricky area - gerunds and infinitives - at http://www.geocities.com/gwyni_99/gerinfless.html. He also offers a list of verbs and practice tests

For articles, see my own site at http://articlespace.blog-o-matic.com/.

2006-02-11T12:09:00.000-08:00

Online Resources 3: Writing and Editing

Although your writing is not something you can change overnight, you can make a little bit of progress every day. Hopefully this course has given you some resources to learn and improve.

There are useful online resources which can help you to write more clearly and effectively and to develop sharper skills as an editor. Here are my six top recommendations:

1. The European Union 'Fight the Fog' campaign for clear writing at http://europa.eu.int/comm/translation/en/ftfog/index.htm. This is a very engaging site with a 12-page 'How to Write Clearly' booklet and 'Teach Yourself Fog-fighting' exercises similar to those used on my course. There's also humour here, and advice on how to fight 'Eurobabble'. Highly recommended.

2. The UK Plain English campaign at http://www.plainenglish.co.uk/. This is an independent pressure group promoting the use of clear written English in government, law and business. Go to 'Free Guides' for PDF versions of their useful and practical writing booklets, including 'How to Write Plain English'.

3. Sherry Roberts business writing seminar at http://www.editorialservice.com/11ways.html gives 11 tips for effective writing. Simple and effective.

4. The Online Writing Lab (OWL) at Purdue University, USA, has excellent pages on writing at http://owl.english.purdue.edu/handouts/pw/index.html. Advice on many topics including memos, reports and letters. Useful and easy to read. The home page links to resources on punctuation, grammar and spelling. This is probably the biggest and longest running OWL on the web.

5. The Editorial Eye at http://eeicom.com/eye/eyeindex.html is widely used by professional editors. It has a searchable database of articles on editing and language. It's not a list of practical tips, but you may find answers to your questions here.

6. If you are a legal professional you may find Bryan Garner's Legal Writing in Plain English at http://press-pubs.uchicago.edu/garner/ useful. This is the free online version of his book, but there are many tips and exercises here on how to edit your legal writing to make it more reader-friendly.

If you come across any useful writing web sites, please let me know!

2006-02-11T05:37:00.000-08:00

Writing Tip 3: Who is in Charge of this Sentence?

Some sentences can get rather overloaded!

When editing a piece of writing you may need to make changes to the sentences. As you try to get everything down on paper, it is easy to overload your sentences with too much information or make your sentences too long. You may also produce sentences which are clear to you as the writer, but which will not be clear to a reader.

In editing, you need to train yourself to read your own writing with a critical eye. You need to stand back from what you have written and see if it really communicates what you wish to say. Often you need to unpack some things from a sentence to make it work.

Here are two things to look out for when editing overloaded sentences:

1. Where is the Subject?

The subject of a sentence is the main person or thing performing the main action. It is not necessarily the same as the topic of the sentence. When writing, it is quite easy to lose your sentence subject in the topic:

Following our recent phone conversation of 6 February in which we discussed the possibility of cooperation between our two agencies in restoring an NGO presence in the city of Balan following the end of the civil war there and agreed to look further into ways and means, I am writing to you to propose that we meet in the coming weeks to discuss further the idea of cooperation between our two agencies.

'I' here is the subject of the sentence and 'am writing' is the main verb (and purpose) of the sentence. Before getting to the subject the writer has used a long sub-clause (actually more than one!) to introduce the background topic or 'archive' of the letter. As an opening sentence in a letter this is too long and overloaded.

Notice how the second half the sentence runs into problems. The writer is forced to repeat the word 'cooperation'. This is confusing for the reader because the sub-clause has done all the work of the sentence, leaving the main clause with little to do.

How could this be improved?

Firstly, the writer could try using a shorter introduction clause:

Following our recent phone conversation about possible cooperation in Balan, I am writing.....
Here the subject is closer to the start of the sentence and the 'archive' is kept to a minimum.

Another approach would be to remove the introductory phrase altogether and put the topic or 'archive' into a second sentence:

I am writing to propose that we meet in the coming weeks to discuss possible cooperation between our two agencies in restoring an NGO presence in the city of Balan. As you will recall, we recently discussed this matter in a phone conversation on 6 February and agreed to look further into the ways and means of cooperation.

Here the first sentence has a clearer S V O pattern: SUBJECT ('I') + MAIN VERBS ('..am writing to propose') and OBJECT ('...the possibility of cooperation..'). These are the key elements of the sentence. The sentence makes both subject and topic clear. The second sentence is the 'archive' as it mentions the phone call. Although the word 'cooperation' is used again in this second sentence, a new concept ('ways and means') is introduced, preparing the reader for the next part of the letter.

2. Chunk Down

The problem of long sentences is often solved simply by chunking down: turn one long sentence into two or more shorter ones. Consider this example:

Working together could have considerable benefits for both our organisations because it would mean that we could share premises and operational costs and communicate better with the government authorities in Balanan, and moreover we could make more effective representations to world governments and the United Nations, who as you know recently identified Balanan as a country in need of long-term reconstruction aid and encouraged NGOs to work together in the post-war recovery period.

This sentence begins well. Its subject ('Working together') and its main verbal unit ('will have considerable benefits for..') are both clear. It runs into problems because it tries to fit too many items into the rest of the sentence. There are too many linking words (because + and + and + and + moreover + and + who + and) all trying to hold the sentence together.

How could this be solved? Try breaking the long sentence down into smaller ones:

Working together could have considerable benefits for both our organisations. We could, for example, share premises and operational costs. We could also secure better communication with the Balanan government. Moreover, we could make more effective representations to world governments and the United Nations. The latter recently identified Balanan as a country in need of long-term reconstruction aid and encouraged NGOs to work together in the post-war recovery period.

This revised version makes four sentences out of the original one. There is now no sense of the text being overloaded with information. The sentences follow on from each other. Note how 'we' in the second sentence relates back to 'our organisations' in the first; and 'the latter' in the fifth sentence relates back to 'the United Nations' in the fourth.

Note here how 'Moreover' works better as a sentence opener, followed by a comma, than in the middle of a sentence. As well as adding another point to the writer's argument it signals a slight change of direction in the paragraph.

Other 'signpost' words which can be used to begin sentences and signal changes of direction are:

However,.......Furthermore,......In contrast,........First of all,..........Consequently,.........

Writing Tips:
* Try to get your sentence subject close to the start of the sentence
* Make sure the main verbs of the sentence are clear
* Chunk down if your sentence is becoming too long or complicated
* Limit the number of linking words (and, but, moreover) that you use in one sentence
* Try using some signpost words at the start of sentences
* Don't be afraid of the short sentence. It can work wonders!

2006-02-11T05:20:00.000-08:00

Workshop Four Review

Summary of Workshop Four: Editing

The focus of this workshop was on how we can improve our writing at the level of sentences, especially when revising and editing a text.

Usually when we draft, we tend to over-write. We are trying to find the words and phrases to get our message across as effectively as possible; but at the same time we are trying to keep an eye on the overall purpose and structure of our text. We may several times need to re-arrange the order of information. Inevitably we will repeat ourselves, leave things out, write sentences that are too long, or use unnecessary words when drafting.

When we revise and edit, we need to put ourselves in the position of the reader and make our writing as clear, precise and reader-friendly as possible. We need to:

*cut out unnecessary words and phrases
*sharpen sentences so that the the main subject/verb/object are clear first time
*reduce long or clumsy sentences by breaking them up
*use some very short sentences, especially at the end of paragraphs
*make sure the 'signposts' that link sentences together are clear

In the workshop we looked at seven 'red flags' of written communication - typical areas where writing can easily become 'foggy':

1. Circumlocutions - long phrases which can usually be replaced by a single word.

2. Redundancies - words and phrases which are just 'padding' and are not doing anything useful.

3. Garble - sentences with mixed or confused messages where the subject/verb/object are not clear on a first reading.

4. Non-parallels - sentences with two or more items, often separated by 'and' or 'but', which are not using the same grammar.

5. Passives - sentences where the subject doing the action is not clear.

6. Nominalisations - nouns which can easily be replaced by verbs.

7. Emphatic Words - words which are used for emphasis but don't add much to the communication.

The course manual p. 34 gives a summary of these seven 'problem areas' and advice on how to edit each one. Have a go at the exercises if you haven't done so already.

It is worth training yourself to edit after you have done a first draft to make sure that your writing communicates as quickly and as clearly as possible. Concentrate on sentences and always try to identify the SVO: SUBJECT - VERB - OBJECT.

Preview: in the fifth workshop we will look further at how to KISS writing (KISS = Keep It Short and Simple). I will summarise the advice on editing. We will then move on to look at writing proposals and do a workshop activity which involves both re-arranging and editing a text to meet a word limit.

2006-02-11T05:07:00.000-08:00

Writing Numbers

Often when writing memos, letters and reports you need to refer to numbers. How do you do this? Should you use figures ('8'), words ('eight'), or a mixture of both?

The answer: it depends on the number, the context and the type of communication you are writing. The UN Correspondence Manual (pp. 38-39) gives detailed rules regarding numbers in everyday correspondence. In most technical and statistical communication, figures are used. Figures are also used for presenting a large amount of data in a report. In memos, letters and legal documents, a mixture of figures and words is used.

Here are the main rules you need to know for everyday writing of numbers:

1. Numbers under 10 should be written as words:
The report contains six sections.
The delegation visited four areas where rebel incursions had been reported in the previous two weeks.

2. All numbers should be written in words at the beginning of sentences:
Four hundred and fifty women were selected.
Sixty miles separates the two warring factions.

3. Fractions and ages should be written as words in non-technical, non-statistical texts:
Only two-thirds of the delegates voted.
This applies to everyone over the age of eighteen.

4. Numbers between 10 and 999,999 are normally written as figures:
The number of staff now stands at 1,417.
Although 69 people applied for the grant, only five were successful.

5. Percentages and ratios are always written as figures:
The budget increase for 2006 is projected to be 3 per cent.
The ratio of yields per hectare was 10:1.
Note: 'per cent' is used, not '%', except in statistical texts.

5. Results of elections and matches are written as figures:
The resolution was adopted by 15 votes to none, with 65 astentions.
The staff team lost the match 6-3.

6. Dates and times are written as figures:
On Thursday, 26 May 2005 at 10.30 am.
Note: dates in United Nations correspondence are always written in this form. Forms such as 26/05/05 are not used. Time is indicated as above (not 10:30). Twenty-four hour clock may be used (2100, not 21.00).

7. Numbers with fractions should be written as figures:
Costs were reduced by 10.75 per cent and profits almost doubled, increasing 1.75 times over the previous year.

8. Dimensions, weights and measures should be written as figures:
The container is 10.5" long, 6" wide and 3.2" deep.
It weighs 1.2 kg.

9. Reference numbers are written as figures:
I am referring to chapter V, page 13, paragraph 2, in document A/54/1.

Note: for items 3-9, words are used if the number appears at the beginning of a sentence:Two-thirds of the delegates voted.

10. Sums of money are written as figures:
The Committee was promised a relief sum of $20,000.

11. When indicating a number range, figures are used with either 'to' or a dash, and the unit given after the second item:
Salary increases across the region ranged from 3 to 4 per cent.
The shells landed 2 - 3 km from the village.
The increase in the number of children in the 8 - 15-year-old age group is marked.
He served in seven field offices from 1997 to 1999 (not 1997-99).

12. When giving high value number ranges, the unit is repeated to avoid any confusion:
The fund increased from $2 million to $4 million during the period.

13. When numbers are combined sometimes it is necessary to use words for one item to avoid confusion:
I ordered twenty 15-cent stamps.
I received 120 fifteen-cent stamps.
The raft was made of 12 ten-foot poles.
The class consisted of 30 seven-year-old children.
Note the hyphens used in these examples.

14. Figures are used if they are part of the name of a product type:
B-2 bomber, Airbus A340, Lockheed P-3 Orion, 7-11 stores. 5.5-inch calibre, 25-pounder.

2006-02-11T04:38:00.000-08:00

United Nations Correspondence Manual: Highlights

As a participant on this course you have a copy of the United Nations Correspondence Manual 2000. This manual is a guide to the drafting, processing and dispatch of correspondence in English within the United Nations system. Unfortunately this document is not available online.

Much of the Manual refers to the preparation of documents in the General Assembly and the various Offices of the United Nations. If you need to prepare routing slips, covering slips or similar documents you might find the relevant pages useful. If you are planning a career move within the UN it is worth being aware of this document.

The Manual does not make good bedtime reading. However, I would encourage you to at least be aware of the following sections:

pages 12-19 general guidelines for memoranda and formal letters, including salutations and complimentary closing phrases

pages 29-30 brief guidelines on drafting

page 30 British spelling preferred

pages 30-37 Capitalisation: when to use initial capitals. This is very useful. As well as general advice, the Manual gives a list of examples, frequently found in United Nations documents, which use either upper or lower case

page 38 Numbers (see my summary on this weblog, 'Writing Numbers')

pages 40-41 Abbreviations and plurals

Access to United Nations documents such as resolutions, missions reports and official letters has been made much easier by the introduction of the UN Documentation Centre at http://www.un.org/documents/. Here you can get some idea of the conventions for UN reports and correspondence by just browsing the site. However, there appears to be no agreement between UN bodies about how written texts should be drafted and presented.

2006-02-08T11:12:00.000-08:00

Writing Tip 2: How do you get started?

Ever get writer's block?

Everyone gets stuck as a writer at some point. Even Shakespeare must have occasionally thought 'What next?' But getting started on a new text is one of the most common sticking points for everyone.

How can you get yourself unstuck? Here are some suggestions when you are facing a blank sheet of paper or screen:

1. Don't start with sentence number one!
You can waste a lot of time trying to think of a good opening sentence or a subject line. Don't! You may be lucky and find the first sentence of your letter or memo popping into your head as soon as you start writing. But this is unlikely, even on a good day. It is best to free your mind from the need to write sentences, especially the first one.

2. Think Keywords
Instead of writing sentences, write down the keywords that must be included in the communication. These may be topic words ('co-operation', 'sharing premises') or they may be verbs ('propose', 'request') or they may even be facts or statistics. If you have a brief from a supervisor, notes from a meeting or even an earlier memo, brainstorm the keywords while re-reading them.

3. See the Whole
Take a visual outline (like the inverted pyramid model) and plan what each section of the text will do. Use your keywords. Try to visualise your text in three or four sections. You may have more then three or four paragraphs in the end, but your outline is a start. Be playful. Use diagrams and pictures if they help you. Telling someone else what you need to say may also help to focus your mind on the essentials.

4. Add details
Expand your outline by adding supporting details that readers will need. Picture your readers, anticipate their questions. Again, focus on words and not sentences. You may realise here that one section of your text needs two paragraphs rather then one, or that a piece of information needs to be moved down or up the text. You may also realise that you need to do some research or you need to consult a colleague. Your keywords may change. Keep your thinking fluid. Remember: everything you write at this stage can be changed. Don't imagine yourself writing in an exam room!

5. Focus each Paragraph
Decide now how many paragraphs you are going to use for your first draft. Write one 'topic statement' for each paragraph. This is a summary of the paragraph - what it is about and its purpose. This statement can be a long phrase, connecting the keywords, or - if you are lucky - a full sentence.

6. Go on - Write a Sentence!
Now you should be ready to try some sentences. At this stage, keep them short and to the point. You can connect sentences together when you revise. Imagine that you are talking to your reader. Free write, without worrying too much about the grammar and spelling. You can improve these later. Don't feel that you have to write sentence number one first. You might find it easier to write the last sentence first. Often a good opening sentence only comes after we have done a lot of thinking.

*DON"T BE FRIGHTENED TO WRITE! Get something down on paper, have a short break, and then come back to it. The less anxiety you feel about getting started, the better your writing will be. Once you have made a start it will be easier.

*If English is your second or third language, you may find it easier to do early drafting in your own language and then translate the keywords. However, translating a whole text into English is much more difficult. Writing well in English - or any language - means learning to think in the language, not translate. That is why it is useful to re-use phrases that you know have already been successful, and then build on them.

*Writing prompts can also be useful to get your started. See the end of the course book for some examples. Better: keep effective memos and letters that you receive and borrow words and phrases from them.

2006-02-08T07:20:00.000-08:00

Workshop Three Review

Summary of Workshop Three: Drafting and Organisation

In this workshop we looked at issues involved in drafting a new text. We read the first draft of a letter from one NGO to another and began the task of re-writing it.

The letter showed a number of communication problems which are common in writing for an unknown audience. It has all the information but it is not reader-friendly. It does not give the reader a clear route map and signposts about the text's topic, purpose and intended outcome.

To give the reader a better route map, the letter needs to be:

* better organised in terms of paragraphs
* clearer in its purpose - to suggest cooperation and request a meeting
* more aware of its target audience
* more concise in its use of language (too many long words!)

Your homework is to write an improved version of this letter.

When drafting a new text, I suggest the following approach:

1. Visualise an Outline: get an overall 'picture' of your text by planning out the paragraphs you will have. Give a purpose or title to each paragraph. Remember: everything can be changed later, but you need an initial vision to work on. If you are working in a team it is helpful to do this with others. You need a map of the whole text to work with.

2. Choose your Keywords: identify the keywords and pieces of information which can be used in each paragraph. Don't attempt to write sentences unless a striking phrase hits you. Instead, note down useful words and phrases. In this letter, for example, the word 'cooperation' might trigger similar words like 'partnership', 'joint', 'working together', 'sharing resources'.

3. Sequence: for each paragraph consider how words will be connected and the order in which the reader will get them. Plan the route the reader will take. In the body of the letter, for example, it might be helpful to have three main points to explain the benefits of cooperation: sharing premises and transportation; sharing costs; and communication with the local government. Which order should these three points be presented in? And can they be summarised in another way? For example: logistics, finance, communication.

4. Draft Topic Sentences: write a draft topic sentence for each paragraph. This is the main sentence of the paragraph, the one that holds it together. It usually comes at the beginning of the paragraph, but can also come at the end (see the examples given at the start of the workshop). The other sentences are supporting sentences. You may have a concluding sentence at the end, but this is more common in academic writing.

5. Connect: when you have a fairly detailed draft and you are happy with the content, consider how the paragraphs will be connected. How will each paragraph begin? Linking words, sometimes called 'signposts', do a lot of work in writing. They give the reader a route map. In this letter, good signposts to begin paragraphs might be:

'Further to...In the light of....Furthermore.....Given.....Therefore....'

Remember, these words can be changed later when you revise and edit. Use the list of signposts in the handout given at the start of the workshop.

Talking Points on Drafting

Here are some talking points from this workshop. They could apply to writing in any situation where you do not know the audience very well and/or you need to be tactful about what you say.

- How do you start? It's always useful to refer to a previous conversation, such as the phone call ('Following our phone conversation on 12 February....'), and give a brief phrase to introduce the topic ('the possibility of cooperation in Balanan'). It is also important to identify the purpose of the letter ('to propose a meeting to discuss'). Don't overload the first paragraph with lots of description or context.

- How much background should you give? In this letter, both sides are familiar with the civil war in Balanan so only a brief reference to the situation is needed. It is important to recognise the expertise of the audience and not 'talk down' to them. Rather than describe the situation it is better to give some details about the proposing NGO's decision to resume work in the country and what its aims are. Any background information should be designed to make way for the proposal about cooperation and not just be given for its own sake.

- How do you use potentially sensitive information? The reference to the Secretary General's speech could be viewed either positively or negatively, depending on the other side's views. In this case, where there is uncertainty, it is better to omit the reference or use it further down the letter as a secondary point. A reference like this is only useful if it backs up the main purpose of the letter - to propose cooperation.

Also in this workshop we looked at:

* Paragraphs: topic sentences and supporting sentences
For more on basic paragraphs see this Australian site:
http://www.ncistudent.net/StudySkills/WritingSkills/WritingParagraphs.htm
* Signpost words: furthermore, in addition, however
* Bullet points: how and when to use them
For more on bullet points see this post from an earlier web log:
http://ictywritingcourse.blogspot.com/2005_05_26_ictywritingcourse_archive.html
* Visual layout

See handouts and the course book for more details.

Preview: In the fourth workshop we will look at editing. We will do some exercises on how to make your writing more effective at the level of sentences.

2006-02-08T00:31:00.000-08:00

Email

Email is transforming the way we use writing.

E-mail technology makes written communication more like everyday conversation. It is rapid, interactive and informal. Email has fewer conventions than traditional writing and consequently there is more scope for personal style. Connection to the web and other document sources allows us to copy/paste material into emails with ease. We can use colour, emoticons, graphics, send photos.

Using email has become a regular feature of our lives. Indeed, can we now imagine a world without it? So long live electronic mail!

However, the speed and informality of email can sometimes work against effective communication in the workplace. It can make writing imprecise, casual and unstructured. It can make language sloppy and inaccurate. It encourages too many abbreviations. The interactive nature of email means that many messages are sent unchecked. Although most email programmes have spellcheck facilities, many people never use them.

Moreover, email can be used to avoid face-to-face communication, especially by those in positions of power. Sending bad news in a quick email on a Friday afternoon shows poor management skills, but is very tempting for the writer who does not want to meet people face to face.

SEND

And then there is the SEND button. Have you ever pressed 'send' and then noticed a major mistake in your message? Have you ever pressed 'send' and then had an attack of 'message regret' (I wish I had never sent that email!)? Maybe you have even sent an email and then had to phone the recipients to explain your message.

E-mail makes writing easier and quicker. But it may hinder effective communication in work and business, especially when a writer is conveying information or making a request to more than one person. The formal clarity of the memo and the letter can easily be lost in a flood of emails.

And then there are the familiar problems arising from quickfire technology: message overload (I have had 200 messages today and it's only 11am), unnecessary forwarding of messages (Why have I received this along with 100 other people?) and of course the dreaded spam.

Distinguish between Memo and Email

Emails are informal, person-to-person, interactive, unstructured and temporary.
Memos are formal, organisational, information-based, structured and archived.

Use emails for short requests and for communication with people you know or colleagues in a close-knit team. Use memos for any communication that may be kept or passed on to others, following the advice and examples given in this course. Even though most memos are sent electronically, they should not look like casual emails. A memo has to be remembered.

Email Etiquette

Even when using email between colleagues or members of a team, you should follow some etiquette. You never know at work when a message may be kept or passed on to someone else. Indeed, some companies have even introduced email etiquette policies in order to prevent misuse and abuse.

Of course, etiquette only works if everyone follows it. The following sites on e-mail etiquette may give you some ideas to discuss with colleagues.

http://www.emailreplies.com/ 32 tips for e-mail etiquette
http://www.dynamoo.com/technical/etiquette.htm Do's and Don'ts of emailing

Two more interesting articles about e-mail:
*Writing at work - is e-mail destroying business writing?http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/business/4059077.stm
*Is email befuddling your brain? Try this quiz: http://www.guardian.co.uk/quiz/questions/0,5961,1466662,00.html

Don't Write!

Sometimes it is better not to write but to pick up the phone or talk to someone. Emailing can be like having a conversation (indeed, this is how Google have marketed their gmail programme). But it is not always the best way to share ideas or to plan a document in a team. Written communication in a team is often more effective after a face-to-face meeting where everyone can have their say.

Also, when writing a memo, remember that consulting with others is often a crucial part of the planning stage.

2006-02-03T14:49:00.000-08:00

Where did Writing Begin?

Both Egyptian and Sumerian civilisations started using writing about 3,000 years B.C. The Sumerians used a kind of picture writing called cuneiform on clay and stone tablets. The Egyptians used another form of picture writing, heiroglyphs, on papyrus.

Early writing shows different functions. Although its main use was to record things, just like some memos today, it was also used to tell popular stories, make religious offerings, and commemorate the dead.

If you get a chance to visit the Louvre Museum in Paris, have a look at the Sumerian art. Most of the sculptures there have pieces of writing on them. Also, most Egyptian art is adorned with writing of some kind.

In Sumerian and Egyptian times less than 1% of people knew how to write.

2006-02-03T12:52:00.000-08:00

Writing Tip 1: Long or Short Sentences?

When writing, should you use long or short sentences? You might think that short sentences are more effective because they are easier to read. But in practice lots of short sentences can be just as difficult to read as lots of long ones. The best approach is to

combine long and short sentences.

Compare these two opening paragraphs of the memo from workshop two:

The SACT met recently. It is planning to propose training courses on web design. The courses will be offered to all staff. The company has recently decided to enhance its internet and intranet facilities. The courses will include learning html and web design applications. They will not include programming. The committee is planning to make a budget submission. The submission will be at the end of the year. Your feedback is needed. Your feedback will help the committee in making a successful submission. Feedback is welcome any time before 15 November.

Following a recent meeting, the SACT is planning to propose training courses on web design in response to the company's recent decision to enhance its internet and intranet facilities. These courses will be offered to all staff. They will include learning html and web design applications but will not include programming. The committee is planning to make a budget submission at the end of the year and needs your feedback on the proposed training in order to make the submission as successful as possible. Your feedback is welcome any time before 15 November.

The first paragraph has eleven sentences, all of which are short and have only one clause. But is it easy to read? Is it reader-friendly?

The second paragraph has five sentences of different lengths and using different types of clauses. It has the same information, but instead of reading like a list the items are combined. The words in green link together pieces of information. They also help to link each sentence to the one just before it.

The second paragraph is more effective than the first because it combines long, medium and short sentences. Sentence one has three pieces of information. Sentence two, by contrast, has only one. It is this variety in length that makes the writing more effective.

Look again at the sentences in paragraph two. It has this pattern:

LONG....SHORT.....MEDIUM......LONG......SHORT

The two short sentences give very important information to the reader, but they only work in combination with the two longer sentences (giving three pieces of information each) and the medium-sized sentence (two pieces of information).

The phrase 'the proposed training' is added to link and repeat the key words of the memo - proposal and training.

Writing Tips:
* Combine long, medium and short sentences in a single paragraph.
* Try putting short sentences at the beginning, in the middle or at the end.
* Make sure the short sentences communicate important information.
* Deadlines and key dates are effective at the end of the first paragraph of a memo.
* Repeat the keywords of a memo several times (including subject line).

It is helpful to know some of the basic sentence patterns in English. See this site for some examples: http://owl.english.purdue.edu/handouts/grammar/g_sentp.html

2006-02-03T12:47:00.000-08:00

Online Resources 2: Dictionaries

If you need to look up a word, why not use an online dictionary? There are now several free online dictionaries on the web. Most of them offer additional resources on language such as 'a word a day' or bilingual dictionaries.

I reviewed online dictionaries recently and tested them with a list of words including infighting, tsunami, blogosphere and hello. Here is my top 5 with brief comments. Let me know your opinions!

1. Cambridge Dictionaries Online http://dictionary.cambridge.org/. Searches the Cambridge Advanced Learner's Dictionary. Also has options for English/French and French/English. Nice additional feature is the 'Top 20' most searched words, updated every month.

2. Ask Oxford http://www.askoxford.com/?view=uk Searches the Oxford Compact English Dictionary. Has UK or US viewing options. Lots of additional features including 'Commonly Misspelled Words'and 'New Words in English'. Note: The Shorter Oxford English Dictionary is the dictionary recommended by the United Nations.

3. Word Reference http://www.wordreference.com/ Has English dictionary, but also English to French, Spanish and Italian.

4. Merriam Webster Online http://www.m-w.com/ The best dictionary for US English. Also has an online thesaurus and a kids' dictionary.

5. Dictionary Reference (meta search) http://dictionary.reference.com/ Searches a number of online resources and displays multiple entries. Also has audio file prounciation for words.

Other online dictionaries you may find useful:

* http://acronymfinder.com/ Your first stop on the web for abbreviations eg. UNCTAD, PDF, ICTY.

* http://www.visualthesaurus.com/ A new approach to word-finding. Search for a word and it produces a visual map of that word and related words. At the moment free only for a trial period.

* http://www.infovisual.info/ Another new concept. A visual dictionary in topic areas - plants, animals, the human body and transport.

* http://dictionary.law.com/ A large dictionary of legal terms in English covering both US and British systems.

* http://www.ircpolitics.org/glossary.html A glossary of political terms used in US and British English.

* http://allserv.rug.ac.be/~rvdstich/eugloss/welcome.html A multilingual dictionary of medical and health-related terms. Translations are available into nine European languages. The site is sponsored by the European Commission.

* http://euabc.com/ Another EU-sponsored site. A multi-lingual (ten languages!) dictionary of terms used in the European Union debate and EU documents, including the new Constitution.

2006-02-03T12:42:00.000-08:00

Online Resources 1: Style Guides

For questions about punctuation, vocabulary and language usage a style guide is probably your best resource. Style guides can be helpful in answering questions like:

* When can I use a semi-colon?
* Do I need hyphens in the phrase 'ten-year-old car'?
* When do I use affect and when do I use effect?
* Do I use initial capital letters when writing 'Committee Room 4'?

These may sound like trivial questions, but when you are writing such small things do matter. And, of course, you may come up against the same (small) problem over and over again.

Sometimes style guides give different advice (eg the use of commas in British and American English), but they often agree on the basic things. Some style guides are used in particular organisations (eg the BBC, NATO). Others apply to particular professions such as law or journalism or refer to academic writing only. The United Nations has its own Correspondence Manual which we will look at later in the course.

Here are some suggestions for online style guides which are useful in everyday writing.

* The Economist Style Guide is one of the most respected style guides for British English. As the UN policy on language officially follows British English it might be worth getting a copy of this to keep in the office. It is now partly online at http://www.economist.com/research/StyleGuide/. Clear, reader-friendly and unfussy. This is highly recommended as a resource for writers at all levels.

* The Chicago Manual of Style is one of the most respected and widely used style guides for American English. The manual is not yet available in full online, but the site has searchable FAQs which may answer your questions at http://chicagomanualofstyle.org/cmosfaq.html

* Several newspapers now have their style guides online. Try The Guardian's Stylebook at http://guardian.co.uk/styleguide/0,5817,184913,00.html and The Times Style Guide at http://timesonline.co.uk/section/0,,2941.00.html.

* Some English language sites have sections on usage. A particularly good one is run by the Usingenglish.com site at http://www.usingenglish.com/english-articles.html#englishusage.

* If you need to write on the web, you may find a web style guide useful. There are now hundreds of these available, often giving contradictory advice. One that I have found useful and easy to consult is http://webstyleguide.com/.

2006-02-03T12:09:00.000-08:00

Workshop Two Review

Inverted Pyramid, Louvre Carrousel, Paris

Summary of Workshop Two: Organisation and Planning

In this workshop we looked at different ways of planning information in a memo. We looked at the importance of having some initial structure, such as the pyramid model, but also of the need to adapt structures in practice according to the specific situation. The writing exercise stressed the importance of selecting and combining pieces of information. The use of effective subject lines, keywords and the balance between informing and motivating language was also discussed.

Planning Writing

If a situation is well known and we have used similar communication before, we usually write quickly and have few problems with content and language. This is the case with short request memos and emails that we write every day. Our writing in these situations becomes so predictable and rehearsed that we almost do not think about it.

But what about writing in an unfamiliar situation involving new information? Before actually writing anything new, we usually have to do some planning. This may involve a series of activities such as

selecting
prioritising
combining
grouping
sequencing

pieces of information in order to get a sense of the whole text before we write a single sentence. Even though, as soon as we begin to plan, words and phrases will - hopefully! - begin to come into our heads.

In order to get this 'sense of the whole', we need to be clear about the writing situation we are in. It is often helpful to do some get-it-in-one planning. Before writing anything new, try to complete the four missing blanks in this sentence:

'This memo/letter to _______________(audience) is to ______________ (purpose) about ___________________ (topic) so that ___________________ (outcome or 'uptake').'

Doing this can help you to focus on the overall situation and the type of communication required. This is often better than struggling to think of a first line.

Other forms of planning include:

i. Bullet planning: make a short and concise plan of the whole text in key words and phrases. Try to see in advance the sections of the whole text, even if the final product will not have headings. Memos, for example, often work on the basis of three sections - 'big news', supporting details, action request - and reports may have six or more sections - summary, introduction, background, findings, evaluation, conclusions/recommendations. This kind of planning helps you to identify the essential words (eg 'feedback' in the web training memo) which you will use in the subject line, the first paragraph and probably again at the end of the text.

ii. Strategy planning: make a plan of the key words and phrases in the text in the order in which you want readers to get them. Identify a strategy for the communication, how one idea leads to another. As writing is a visual as much as a mental activity, the order in which readers get information does matter. See the two examples in the manual, pp. 18-19. The arrows indicate the 'flow' of information in each text.

iii. Visual Planning: make a plan of your whole text as a diagram or using boxes/circles to get a sense of the whole. This may be 'brainstorming' or more linear planning. Working in this visual way frees you from the urge to write sentences and encourages you instead to think in terms of key words and ideas. This is particularly useful if you have a lot of information to organise or a lot of data which needs to be summarised or selected. Remember that the visual impact of a whole text does matter (see p. 21 in the manual) so it can help if you plan in a visual way too. This approach may identify, for example, places where bullet points might be effective in a text.

Spending quality time on planning what you write can make all the difference! It can help you to:

* get a sense of 'the whole'
* focus on the audience, purpose, topic and intended outcome
* organise and group together the key ideas, filtering out unnecessary items
* identify the essential or 'signature' words for the whole text
* plan the visual layout
* devise a strategy for the text

Useful Phrases

In the workshop we also looked at various ways of making requests in memos and the standard prompts for beginning and ending memos in UN writing (see pages 57-62). When writing, especially when using a language which is not your first, it always helps to borrow effective phrases from other people's texts. This is not copying! If you receive a memo or a report that you think is well written, keep it and borrow the words and phrases which you find effective.

Preview: in the third workshop we will move on to letter writing and consider further issues of planning and organisation. We will look at a writing situation involving communication between two NGOs. We will look at how to revise texts effectively and begin some exercises on editing. We will also look at bullet points - how to use them, when to use them, and when to avoid them!

2006-02-01T03:34:00.000-08:00

Workshop One Review

Summary of Workshop One: Memos

Our first session focused on common communication problems in workplace writing. We identified some of the typical problems encountered in reading memos and similar texts.

Some of the problems we have all come across are:

Excessive Length
Poor structure and organisation
Repetition
Writer does not know if it's a memo or a report
Elaborate language and jargon
Unclear purpose
Too many irrelevant details
Overloaded paragraphs
Information presented as a list
Cold or unfriendly tone
Not enough background context
Too much background context

During the course we will be looking at how we can improve our writing in order to avoid these communication problems.

The course is about how everyday writing can be made more:

clear
concise
organised
reader-friendly
flexible

The emphasis of the course is on writing situations. Whenever we write, however long the text, we need to consider four main factors in the communication:

Content: what is to be communicated?
Purpose: why is the communication necessary?
Audience: who is likely to read and possibly act on the communication?
Roles: what is the relationship between the writer and the reader?

All these factors are important and when you are writing a new text or you have a lot of information to communicate it is worth spending a few minutes on these questions about the writing situation.

Writing Memos: Mr Chatty, Mr Blunt and Mr Messy

In the workshop we compared three fictitious administration memos written in response to the same brief. The three memos all take a different approach.

My evaluation of the three memos:

John 1 takes an informal and casual approach to the task set by Anne. He uses nearly all the information from Anne's email, even lifting whole phrases from it, but he does not edit the language for the audience or the situation. The 'big news' (the date) does not appear until the end of his long memo. He uses bold and underlining to draw attention to the date - techniques discouraged in the body of memos, at least in UN writing. The end of his memo has a weak action statement ('When you get time...') which is hardly designed to motivate the reader. The references to people's first names ('Ingrid', 'Jackie') and the memo's opening phrase ('As most of you are aware...') are too chatty and could exclude colleagues. John 1 has not realised that his audience is 'all staff in HR', not just a small group known to him. However, he does do what Anne asked regarding the background of the form's introduction and he does give a good summary of the changes in paragraph 2.

John 2 takes a more concise and straightforward approach. The memo gets straight to the point and the 'big news' is given in the first paragraph. His memo is shorter than John 1's and has numbered paragraphs. He also indicates at the start who the memo is from and the attachment. The purpose of the memo and the action statement (paragraph 3) are both clear. John 2's subject line is also better then John 1's and he makes some attempt to thank the reader at the end. However, John 2 has omitted some of the information requested by Anne. His language is really too concise - almost blunt. He also uses some rather over-formal language ('henceforth', 'It will be noted..') and at one point a piece of jargon ('modern-day personnel acquisition practice') which could easily have been put in simpler English ('modern-day recruitment'). The date is written correctly according to UN practice: 1 December 2001.

John 3 has included most of the information requested by Anne, but has made little attempt to edit and organise it. There are too many paragraphs and the memo reads like a list. A number of points (eg. 4 and 5) could be combined. The shape of the memo is uneven, with paragraph 6 much longer than all the others. The subject line includes an unnecessary abbreviation. The memo ends in an abrupt way which is not motivating for readers. John 3, unlike the other two writers, does give feedback details (paragraph 6) but in the wrong place. The 'Regards..' at the end is not needed in a formal memo.

Effective Memo Writing

We looked at an example of a more effective memo to illustrate some of the features of good memo writing. See the handout and the manual pages 8-11 for details.

Although every writing situation is different, most effective memos will include some or all of the following features:

* a clear and concise subject line
* the key information or 'big news' in the first paragraph
* key words, especially words used in the subject line, in the first paragraph
* numbered or at least clearly separated paragraphs
* short paragraphs of between 2-5 sentences in length
* a clear and brief indication of the background or context ('archive statement')
* a clear indication of the purpose of the memo
* supporting paragraphs which are relevant to the topic and not overloaded with too much information or bullet points
* requests for action made clearly but politely
* feedback details (if relevant)
* a positive or forward-looking tone at the end
* sender/receiver/attachment details

Think Pyramid

When planning a memo it is useful to use the pyramid structure as shown in the manual on page 10. This helps to organise your thoughts and identify the priority information before you start writing sentences. It also helps you to develop a paragraph structure.

When writing an important new text it is often not a good idea to start with the first sentence or the subject line. Instead, plan the keywords of the text using a visual plan. More of this in workshop two.

Pages 57-62 in the manual give some useful phrases for opening and closing memos and for making requests.

The second workshop will focus on planning and organising information in memos, how to make requests, and how to combine pieces of information.

2006-01-25T14:35:00.000-08:00

Welcome to the web log of the ICTY training course on Effective Written Communication, January 31 - February 16 2006. The course sessions take place on Tuesdays and Thursdays from 10.00 - 11.30 am.

I will use this web space during the three weeks of the course to post summaries of workshops, homework assignments and handouts which are not in the course manual. Also here you will find information on writing and links to useful web resources as the course unfolds.

Updates appear on Wednesday and Friday mornings.

This is a blog and not a web site, so material here will be archived and eventually deleted. I encourage you to print out or copy things you find useful. You can also create your own web space through Blogger to store materials and links.

For a sneak preview of the course, you could take a look at the full web log from the last course in 2004 at http://ictywritingcourse.blogspot.com/. Browse the archive for ideas, links and samples of writing by previous course participants. Or you could just wait for this course!

What is the course about?

This course of workshops is for ICTY staff members who wish to improve the quality and effectiveness of their written communication in English. The course focuses on forms of writing such as memos, letters and proposals which are commonly used in workplace situations. In practical workshop sessions participants learn about the factors which make for clear, effective and reader-friendly writing.

During the course participants will improve their skills in:
* planning, organising and revising texts for maximum clarity and effect
* anticipating the needs of readers
* using concise, effective and appropriate written English

Participants are invited to draft, write and revise a series of short texts for various purposes and to reflect on the factors which help or hinder communication.

Some of the key questions of workplace writing addressed on the course are:

*How can we reduce the length of memos and emails by summarising information better?
*How can we make written requests effectively?
*How can we motivate and interest readers?
*When do we need to be especially tactful in writing?

Resources are provided for each session, including material from previous UN training manuals. Exercises are designed to meet specific needs wherever possible. If you have any questions or you are looking for specific help or advice, please ask!

The course includes tips on solving everyday problems in spelling and grammar and alerts you to some common errors in language use. But it is not a course on English language. My ictyEnglish web log at http://ictyenglish.blogspot.com/ has short grammar and usage tips every week. You are welcome to use the site even if you are not attending classes.

The course focuses on writing in English in international and UN settings. It includes some discussion on cultural issues and how they affect written communication. A brief summary of the UN Correspondence Guide 2000 and advice on useful books and websites on writing is given.

The course focuses on shorter texts such as memos, letters and proposals. A companion course on Report Writing deals with longer texts and will hopefully be offered in the ICTY later in 2006.

It is impossible to cover the whole subject of writing in just three weeks. You never stop learning to write better. However, the course should give you ideas and resources to help you improve immediately and to get you thinking about the key issues in effective written communication.

I hope you find the course enjoyable and useful.